Friday, December 21, 2007

I Would Aim For The Dogs Across The Street.

I guess some dogs craft sentences, presenting their observations about joy, happiness and bones...

while others gauge distance, wind resistance and muzzle velocity so that their humans can kill shit.

Still, I stand in awe.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

One Happy Dog.

Last week my human was sick. Every afternoon, I'd hang around waiting to go for a walk, but no dice. It sucked.

Then, yesterday, I guess he was feeling better. He hooked me up and off we went.

I've written before about how wonderful it is to go on a walk. So forgive me if I'm being redundant. But it's truly glorious. For a dog, it's maybe the best thing ever. Except for being petted or getting a raw bone.

It was raining, but I didn't care. As we approached the first street where we turn, I spotted an exceptionally ugly dog walking with his human. Like me, he was a mutt-dog, but there was something different about him. Man, he was ugly, and I did NOT like the way he looked at me. I growled at him to let him know that I would not tolerate anything less than his complete submission.

He barked, as if to say, "pttoo... I spit at you and your ill-perceived dominance, you red-haired prick!"

That's all it took. The hair on my back stood straight up and gave him my very best growl-bark. It was all my human could do to hold my collar and keep me from running across the street and tearing his throat out.

It was beautiful - in a dog kind of way. Afterwards, I hugged my human, like I always do. I like to let him know that none of my hostility is intended for him.

When you almost fight, it really makes you feel alive.

Man, do I love going on walks.

Sunday, December 16, 2007


I have no idea what this picture is about. And even with my vivid imagination, I'm not sure I can even guess.

And why is that asian guy saluting in the background? Any ideas?

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Dude, Seriously, Down A Notch.

Found this picture on the web.

Hey, it's great to be happy. And, like any dog, I enjoy a good romp.

But c'mon!

This guy is what I like to call "a jumper." We've all seen them before, walking with their humans, just baaaaarely on the edge of sanity. Thing is, they're hard to fight. You just can't nail 'em down.

I like the look of the one behind him. He's just waiting to take over... in case Jumpy McCaffeine gets tired.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Not bad, for a dog.

cash advance

If you're a blogger, and you click on the link above, you can enter the address of your site and it will tell you at what reading level you write.

Mine, as you can see, was determined to be "Elementary School" level. Some might take offense to such a designation. I, however, am rather proud. Because remember folks, I'm a dog. That means that while I may drink out of the toilet, I can still scribe as well as your kids.

Have a nice day.

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Funny Commercial.

That's kinda how I feel about my alpha male.